Bach it up

The Bachelor party is approaching. 9 days by my Count. A pre-thank to all involved in planning and participating. I am looking forward to the celebration weekend. I have heard much excitement from many persons. It's been a while since the last b-party (Andy and Alan's? When was it?). That, combined with Matt and myself making our own respective exits from the Golden State, has the recipe for a raucous and memorable weekend. Prepare yourselves, compadres. We shall rock San Simeon to his core.
May we celebrate in the tradition of Sparta (via wiki)

The history of bachelor party is thought to have originated with a bachelor dinner that was traditional in ancient Sparta (5th century) where soldiers would toast each other on the eve of a friend’s wedding.

Bachelor Party

(FORK GLOYD SAYS 'COME TO DARREN'S BACHELOR PARTY!!!')


July 20, 21, and 22 we are going to San Simeon to celebrate me. There has been some confusion as to who is invited, so here is the criteria:
1. You must have a penis.
2. You must like to drink beer.
3. You must like me.
4. You must not be a bogey, hoedad or douche bag.

other good bonus criteria:
-if I have lived with you
-if I have punched you in the face
-if i have gotten into a car accident with you
-if I have traveled with you
-if I have partied with you
-if I have gone to school with you
-if I have naked pictures of you
-if i have broken things with you
-if i have been held at gunpoint with you

comments, questions, suggestions?

Also, respond if you are planning on coming and include what asset you possess that can contribute to the party's awesomeness vibe.